As I sit here, desperately deleting and re-adding the Amtrak train's wifi network, willing the damn thing to work, I'm stricken by just how sentimental I feel toward the ghosts of networks past. Because what, really, is a list of wifi networks—hidden right there in the advanced settings—other than a detailed account of what the heck we've been up to?I'm reminded, instantly, of the desperate emails I've found myself trying to send from a random coffee shop or, in an particularly low moment, the sidewalk outside someone's house.Who hasn't felt the rush that comes with finding out that the password really was just the network name repeated; the feeling of connectedness that comes with finding out you can mooch off your grandparents' neighbor's network if you sit with your computer just so near a certain window of the house?Who hasn't felt the utter devastation of a pay gate or sneaky password barrier that comes up after you're already connected to a network? The frustration when the barista just can't figure out why the password she gave you isn't working?
But, more than that, as I scroll through the list, I'm reminded of where I've been and who I've met—and I can remember clearly why I was trying to get online in the first place. In fact, I can even remember how miserably slow some of these damn networks were (looking at you, "Zayapa Ice Cream & Coffee").For every generic "ATTwifi" and "Linksys" and "Netgear," there's one like "La Pinta Boogaloo," a hostel in Cali, Colombia where I met a dude I travelled around with for a month. I hadn't heard from him until just yesterday, when his Tigers were meeting my Orioles in the first round of baseball's playoffs.There's "HOTEL_CORAZA_1" and "HOTEL_CORAZA_2" and finally, triumphantly, "HOTEL_CORAZA_3," which allowed me to send in a story by the 7 am deadline in a small Ecuadorian town.Then, there are the standbys. There's no password entering, at least not after the first time. There's "7GC74" at my parents' house. There's "0W425" at my old house in DC. There's the serial number mumbo-jumbo that is "SMCD3GN-TWCAD" with my old router and now, "MarloHouse," a not-so-subtle reminder that my roommate's cat does, in fact, rule the apartment.I remember why "Bolt Bus" is parked on my list right next to "Ebenezers" which is right next to "BEARAIR" which is right next to "Mackeys," and it makes my stomach drop. I remember taking the bus down to DC to visit Katelin in the hospital, being at Ebenezers coffee shop, distractedly trying to work while I waited for her to be able to see me, and hopping on Children's Hospital's BEARAIR to tell everyone I wouldn't be working for a while when I realized how bad things were.I remember drinking, devastated, by myself at Mackeys and getting online to distract myself from crying. At a bar, on my laptop, in the middle of the day. Four networks. One crystal clear, horrific day.There are networks linked with girlfriends and regular friends and work and conference centers and hotels and places I will certainly never go again, so there's no need for my computer to remember them. But I want to anyway.
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