Kickstarter Admits Crowdfunded "Seduction Guides" Are a Bad Idea

Remember those so-called pick-up artists, the men that dress like Criss Angel meets the Mad Hatter? (There was a TV show, lest you forget.) At its best, the PUA game appears to be about developing one's confidence and conversation skills. At its worst, it's an excuse for mouthbreathing creepers to treat women like mindless objects that can be tricked into a relationship.

Imagine a robot whose one commandment was text from a flashing banner ad from a porn site. (ONE SIMPLE TRICK makes women unable to resist fucking you!) There's your pick-up artist. They've been roundly criticized on the web for years, but every now and then the PUA ethos leaks out of /r/seduction. This week, a Kickstarter for a book called Above the Game came to light, wholly because the book advocates sexual assault. Casey Malone's Tumblr post on why Above the Game is terrible is a must-read, but here's one quote that sums it all up:

Pull out your cock and put her hand on it. Remember, she is letting you do this because you have established yourself as a LEADER. Don't ask for permission, GRAB HER HAND, and put it right on your dick.

If I've learned anything from Law and Order, it's that whipping out one's genitalia and forcibly placing another person's hand on there without permission is assault. (Now, if you've got permission, by all means, go ahead.) And regardless of the legality of one phrase in the book, the ethos professed by it—that the reason women don't like you is because you're a little bitch and that you've got live your life like some caricature of a nature show by dominating the fuck out of females like lions do in order to get laid—is extremely harmful to women.

And yet Kickstarter didn't cancel the project. As you can see from that screenshot above, Above the Game was funded many times over its goal, and when the Kickstarter timer was up, the creators received the funding.

Today, Kickstart published a post explaining its thought process, and apologizing for not cancelling the project despite being committed to not allowing projects that promote violence or harm. It feels heartfelt, and is backed with a $25,000 donation to RAINN—a big gesture on Kickstarter's part. Essentially, Kickstarter says that the project came to its attention two hours before it closed, which wasn't enough time to decide to cancel it, as Kickstarter is committed to protecting creators at all costs.

That's a fair point, as Kickstarter will only work if it takes takedown requests very carefully, both to protect creative integrity and prevent people from trying to sabotage projects with unnecessary complaints. But regardless of whether or not you think two hours is enough time to realize Above the Game was clearly harmful—I mean, it's pretty damn obvious—Kickstarter has also banned seduction guides and the like from future funding.

Kickstarter has done a pretty good job dealing with the aftermath, but it's important to note that Above the Game and the mentality it espouses still have plenty of homes on the web. And damn, it's sad to think that so many people buy into it. Women aren't wild animals who secretly want to be tricked and manipulated and forced around. They're goddamn human beings, and every one of us humans has our own individual needs and preferences. It's sick to think of women as some biological problem that can be hacked.

It's harmful for men, too. Reddit gets unfairly caricaturized sometimes as a den of sleazy forever-aloners, but it's not totally undeserving. It's sad to see emotional snake oil sold to a bunch of men who've had trouble with relationships in the past. Manipulating men who have had trouble connecting with women into thinking that their failures are due to their pussiness or whatever perpetuates the wholly-untrue idea that being manly requires one to be some sort of militant cocksman who takes what he wants and fuck all to anyone who disagrees.

Above the Game is based on a view of the world in which men and women are nothing more than a pair of one-dimensional characters that are toxic in tandem and harmful to each other. The world would be better off if both of these visions of the sexes would go the hell away.

@derektmead