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    The World Needs More Hatchet-Wielding Hobos

    Written by

    Brian Anderson

    This is Kai, straight out of Dogtown. He's got nothing. He's lost track of his age. He's a chill ass dude, and just wants to surf, man. But for anyone out there planning to go berserk by claiming to be Jesus Christ and spouting all sorts of racist bullshit and pinning a bystander between your car and a truck, fair warning: Kai will not hesitate in hatcheting you to death. 

    It's a remarkable story. When the fellow who'd picked up Kai, a transient originally from West Virginia, suddenly snapped, Kai was left with no other option but to hatchet--"SMASH! SMASH! SMAASHHH!"--the crazed man, who then apparently began masturbating right there in the street. The man was out to kill. And if Kai hadn't taken matters into his own hands, the situation could've been far more tragic: "There woulda been hella lotta bodies around here." 

    Seriously, this whole thing is worth watching, if not for the crash couse in street smarts than certainly for what this may say about all those going the way of the Great American Hobo. Godspeed you, Kai, wherever you are. If only there were one of you for every shitball human on this planet. 

    Reach Brian at brian@motherboard.tv. @thebanderson

    Topics: hobo, hatchet