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    The Lyrics to Super Mario's Theme Song are Super Literal

    Written by

    Colin Snyder

    Back in 2003, Nintendo put on a production of the Super Mario theme with a big band backing with a Japanese lounge singer. The iconic song's newfangled lyrics were translated from the Japanese in 2007, and are true to canon. Like absurdly so: Mario, apparently "full of energy," destroys blocks, flagpoles, and turtles to rescue his lady finch. Here's a taste:

    Today, full of energy, Mario is still running, running
    Go and beat the Koopa tribe, go!
    Today, full of energy, Mario runs
    Today, full of energy, jumping!

    There’s even this little spoken word segment in the bridge as the band plays to the tune of the Underwater theme:

    The only one who can reverse the spell that has captured the Mushroom People is Princess Peach. But Princess Peach is hidden underground, in a far-off castle. Ah, the days of peace... if we could once more return to those days... to save Princess Peach and bring peace back to the Mushroom Kingdom, that is why Mario is on his journey today.

    What spell? The spell that turned everyone into shrubbery. (See page two of the Super Mario Bros. Instruction Booklet)

    Pretty goofy. Reminds me of the haiku I wrote in grade school about Space Harrier II.

    Soldiers, just armor
    The trees are made of starfish
    I can’t fly. Ahhhh. Get ready.

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