In 2016, Californians Can Vote to Turn Silicon Valley Into Its Own State

In 2016, California voters will head to the ballot boxes to decide whether or not they want to dissolve the state of California. More specifically, they will determine whether they would like to break up the Golden State into six separate states, including a brand new one called Silicon Valley. Thanks to the persistent efforts of a group headed up by the venture capitalist Tim Draper, Californians will be able to vote on a proposal that would transform Silicon Valley into its very own state, with its very own government.

Draper is the same guy who bought up all of the Silk Road's bitcoins at a government auction, in what must have been the odd spare moment between evangelizing for his 'Six Californias' plan—Draper has blanketed the airwaves, explaining its dubious benefits to Fox News, CNBC, anyone who will listen. Here he is, for instance, pushing the plan at an Orange County Interdenominational Alliance meeting. (For more on the ideological motivations, absurdities, and Trojan horse benefits of the scheme, see our previous coverage of the proposal.)

Now, he has reportedly acquired more than the 808,000 signatures necessary to get his proposition listed on the state ballot for 2016—California has a ballot proposal system that allows citizens a direct vote on measures. However, he has allegedly used some shady, underhanded tactics to win some of those scrawls, according to tipsters at ValleyWag, who say they were pestered in parking lots by Six Californias volunteers who attempted to deceive them into thinking they were signing up to support entirely different propositions.

Six California's Twitter account has a copy of the petition, which you'd think nonetheless would deter unsympathetic signers with the all-caps DIVISION OF CALIFORNIA INTO SIX STATES at the top, but then again, people hate getting approached by anyone when they are in a rush at the grocery store.

To be clear, this plan will not happen. Right now, polling indicates that 59 percent of the state opposes the plan, which still seems shockingly low. But even if Draper launched the most magical technoutopian PR campaign in history, because his proposal requires a constitutional amendment, it would still need the approval of both the state Congress and Legislature, both of which have a rather vested interest in not dissolving themselves.

And yet, with the help of those 808,000 plus signatures, the idea is being treated with a somewhat astonishing amount of respect and sincerity. It is headline news. It is crawling towards the top of Reddit. USA Today made an interactive infographic to accompany its story. All because one very wealthy tech tycoon has enough time, money, and utopian gusto to will his preposterous scheme onto the national stage.

At its core, this is a pretty selfish scheme—in it, the new states would be Silicon Valley, some place called Jefferson (that's what the fringe secessionists in California's north have historically wanted their new state to be called), and a bunch of 'other' Californias (East, West, etc). The semantics involved should be the first indication that this plan is about boosting Draper and Silicon Valley, not the betterment of California. The absurdity is also supplemented by the rather rich irony that Draper's stated aim is to clear away government meddling, yet apparently his remedy is multiplying the amount of existing government by six.

Draper probably figures that the good people of Silicon Valley state would vote away any hindrances to Valley business, and all the forthcoming tangle of other legislative woes would be everyone else's problem. How, for instance, would the six new states deal with water distribution, already a complicated enough challenge in the one state? What would happen to California's public pension, which operates $257 billion and is the second largest in the nation? What about transportation funding? The state park system? All would be radically transformed, for little or no salient reason, other than the a bunch of rich guys are frustrated with taxes and regulations that slow their app rollouts.

So, before you vote two years from now, dear Californian, just imagine it for a second: Silicon Valley State. An entire government run—or not run—by people who shadily rack up signatures, care more about 'innovation' than functioning services and infrastructure, and place themselves squarely at the center of the newly imagined governed universe, at the expense of less disruptive citizens. I don't know if I've ever seen a better case for a downvote.