Thanks to the Sunlight Foundation — a “non-profit, nonpartisan organization that uses the power of the Internet to catalyze greater government openness and transparency” — twits and twats alike may now revel in the perhaps-forgotten-but-never-gone deleted tweetage of overzealous politicians whose thumbs occasionally prove quicker than their brains. Unveiled earlier this week, Politwoops claims to offer “the only comprehensive collection of deleted tweets by U.S. politicians.”
While I realize that the concept of wading through thousands of 140-character-or-less musings so boring, repetitive, or ill-informed that even politicians felt obligated to (attempt to) delete them sounds about as enticing as a lube-free rectal exam, that doesn’t mean there aren’t a few genuine nuggets of gold in this otherwise corn-riddled cesspool of word turd. Forthwith, please enjoy some of the shiniest nuggets that I have been able to scrounge from this otherwise nearly intolerable dreck:
Deleted by Tim Ryan seven months ago after seven minutes:
I’m not sure why you’d delete this. Who the hell’s gonna bring the healthy snacks now?
Deleted by recently defunct presidential candidate Buddy Roemer six months ago after 23 seconds (I believe during one of the Republican presidential debates):
I knew you could play video in slow motion, but who knew you could tweet in slow motion, too?
Speaking of Buddy (who, P.S., dominates this entire site), in case you were wondering: yes, he’s old school, but no, he’s not that old school:
Deleted by Jason Chaffetz six months ago, 30 minutes after a profoundly moving and wide-ranging conversation with @spooney35:
Who doesn’t, Jay? Who doesn’t?
Deleted by Rick Santorum six months ago after 28 seconds:
Either he was worried someone might accuse him of having a sense of humor, or he realized that there might be a bit of disconnect between an evangelical Christian quoting the spawn of Satan himself, Charlie Sheen.
Deleted by Chaka Fattah six months ago after one minute:
I wish he hadn’t deleted this one, frankly. Otter brain diseases don’t get nearly the attention they deserve in the national healthcare debate. Stupid beavers — always dominating the aquatic mammal agenda.
Deleted four months ago by Jeff Fortenberry after 21 seconds:
I’m pretty sure I’ve seen this movie… (Just don’t tell my mom.)
Deleted three months ago after 16 minutes by Mike Turner:
Hey, if you can’t have it, be it.
Deleted eight days ago after eight hours by Gerry Connolly:
Lame Deck Armageddon? I think that’s the strategy I tried last time I played Magic: The Gathering.
Deleted by Denny Rehberg two days ago after 52 seconds:
- Dear Congress, It’s No Longer OK To Not Know How The Internet Works
- Obamagrams for Everybody
- “Kim Jong-il was an “Internet Expert”":http://motherboard.vice.com/2011/12/19/kim-jong-il-was-an-internet-expert