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    The Future is Here: Firemen Are Now Sworn In With iPads Running Bible Apps

    A picture is worth a thousand digitally uploaded words, they say, and this one speaks volumes: Snapped in the middle of a swearing-in ceremony for Atlantic City's new fire captain, it depicts what happens in the year 2013 when city officials realize at the last minute that they've misplaced their Bible. They grab an iPad, of course, and load it up with a holy app.

    It is unknown whether the divine application ultimately uploaded was the popular, free You Version Bible, the fancier Olive Tree Bible Reader, or the user-friendly Logos app. But it has been confirmed that after the biblical app was installed, eight officers all placed their hands on the aluminum tablet and swore in their new captain, as well as a new Battalion Chief. 

    The act of putting one's hand on a bible while advancing in public office is already something of an anachronistic ritual, and it's funny to see how it might be preserved as time leaves the leather bound King James behind. After all, hotels are already swapping out their Bibles for Kindles, such are the times, and some are even skipping a step and replacing God's Word with 50 Shades of Grey. Rest up, weary traveler: thou shalt engage in Twighlight-inspired masochistic sex play. 

    Then again, swearing upon an iPad is really more like putting your hand on the stucco wall of your local mall--so as long as it happens to contain a Bible somewhere in there; maybe the Christian Science reading room has outlasted the bookstore--and pledging to the powers that be that you won't break any rules. 

    Topics: Holy apps

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